Our children are growing up in a diverse world — and that’s a gift. But to truly raise inclusive thinkers, we have to go beyond surface-level “kindness” and teach our kids that differences aren’t scary or wrong — they’re meaningful and worthy of respect.
Whether it’s physical disabilities, learning differences, or neurodivergence, the goal is simple:
To raise kids who don’t just tolerate difference, but celebrate it.
Here’s 6 easy ways to raise inclusive thinkers (it starts at home!):
1. Talk Openly About Differences
Children are naturally curious. When they notice someone using a wheelchair, stimming, or speaking with an assistive device, they may ask questions — sometimes loudly or awkwardly.
That’s OK. It’s an opportunity for you to talk to your kids and have an open dialogue about people with disabilities.
Try saying:
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“Yes, they use that tool to help them move around. Isn’t that cool?”
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“Our brains all work in different ways. Some people communicate with their hands, and that’s beautiful too.”
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“Different doesn’t mean wrong. It just means unique.”
The more you talk about disabilities and neurodiversity with comfort and respect, the more your child learns to do the same.
Read: How to Help Your Child Navigate Encounters With Disability
2. Use Inclusive Books and Media
Representation matters — especially in the stories our children hear and see.
Choose books and shows that feature:
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Disabled characters as heroes, leaders, and friends
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Neurodivergent kids with complex, joyful personalities
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Diverse families and adaptive tools (like wheelchairs, prosthetics, hearing aids, AAC devices)
Book suggestions:
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All the Way to the Top by Annette Bay Pimentel
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Just Ask! by Sonia Sotomayor
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El Deafo by Cece Bell
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My Brother Charlie by Holly Robinson Peete
Normalize these stories. Make them part of your everyday library, not just “special topics” or during certain times of the year.
3. Teach Empathy Over Pity
Pity sounds like: “That poor kid.”
Empathy sounds like: “That kid might do things differently, and that’s okay. We all want friends and fun.”
Help your child understand that people with disabilities want the same things they do — inclusion, joy, independence, and dignity.
Practice empathy by asking:
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“How do you think they feel in this situation?”
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“What’s something kind we can do to make them feel included?”
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“What would it feel like if you couldn’t do something you love — and someone helped you feel welcome?”
Read: 5 Ways Parents Can Encourage Inclusion for Children with Disabilities
4. Encourage Inclusive Play
Play is one of the most powerful tools for building understanding.
Talk to your child about:
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Making space for everyone on the playground
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Asking “Would you like to play with us?” instead of assuming
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Being patient and flexible with how games are played
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Including kids who may communicate or move differently
You can also model inclusive behavior when you’re with other parents and caregivers. Kids watch how we treat others.
5. Use People-First and Identity-Respecting Language
Teach kids to speak with dignity.
Some communities prefer person-first language (e.g., “a child with autism”) and others use identity-first (e.g., “an autistic child”). The most respectful thing we can teach kids is: ask and listen.
But overall, avoid:
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“Suffers from…”
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“Normal vs. special”
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“Handicapped” (use “disabled” or specific terms instead)
Instead, say things like:
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“He uses a wheelchair.”
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“She’s nonverbal but communicates in her own way.”
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“They’re neurodivergent, which means their brain works differently.”
Read: How to Teach Kids How to Understand and Celebrate Differences
6. Reflect on Your Own Beliefs (And Be Honest About Growth)
It’s okay if you weren’t raised with inclusive language or understanding — in fact, I’d guess most of us weren’t.
Take the opportunity to talk openly with your child about what you’re learning, too:
“I used to think differently, but I’ve learned how important it is to listen to people with disabilities.”
Modeling your own growth shows your child it’s safe to ask questions, make mistakes, and stay curious.
Final Thoughts: Inclusion Is a Mindset — Not a Moment
Raising inclusive thinkers doesn’t happen in one big scheduled conversation.
It happens in the little moments:
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When your child invites everyone to the birthday party
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When they speak up for a classmate who’s being left out
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When they see someone’s wheelchair or stim toy and say, “That’s cool!”
When you teach your child that different doesn’t mean less, you give them the power to make the world a kinder, empathetic, more inclusive place, one moment at a time.
Sending you love and light,
Jaime